As we start the New Year, we take the time to review the past and make new resolutions or set new intentions for the year, in our personal and business lives. What about our dating lives? Do you stop and take time to review your dating experiences over the past year? Have you compared what you experienced to what your desires are? Are you dating the right people, or do you always seem to find the wrong ones? Just like with health, exercise, starting a new business venture, the New Year is a good time to make some real decisions about the direction of your dating and relationships.
When we are young, most of us, especially women, have a vision of the perfect person that we are going to marry, the number of children we will have and where we will live. For some of us that dream becomes a reality, but for others life takes other turns. What has interfered with and changed your plans? Was it timing, luck or the decisions you made?
Since writing my book, “Single and Not Settling”, when I meet singles over 40, they all tell me “Yes, I am single, but I am not getting married just to settle. I want to find my soul mate, not just someone for security.” How will this year be different than the last? What will you look at and what changes will you make in how you meet potential life partners?
One of the first things to look at and consider would be who you are attracted to and who is attracted to you. Are the people you are interested in also interested in you? Do you find yourself always falling for the bad boys or the ones who are no good for you? Do you end up with a broken heart, or do you end on a good note? Or do you find those who are only interested in one thing and one thing only? If you are having trouble finding someone worthy of long term dating or relationships, what can you change about how and where you look? What could you do differently?
Another aspect to review is where you look for your dates. Are you a bar person, enjoy club nights, dinners with friends, or other venues? Do you attend singles events geared for specific interests, such as cooking classes, or do you prefer to utilize online dating sites? Any venue could lead to potential dates, but are the venues you are frequenting yielding the results you desire? The issue might not be the venue per se, but if it attracts a different person than you desire, it may be time to change things up. Find venues, sites, classes, events that host the people you most desire to meet. At this time, there are numerous different ways of meeting potential partners, but you need to go where they are. So, if you are looking for someone well read, joining a book club for singles might help. If you are a foodie and enjoy good food, maybe a cooking class for singles or a group that tries different restaurants on a regular basis. Finding groups with similar interests could yield friendships that have a higher potential to turning into something more long term.
So, now that the year has truly begun, what will you do differently with respect to your dating? How will you change your dating habits to make this the year you find your life partner? Go out, enjoy and make this your best dating year yet!